Have you seen The Machinist? No? I didn’t think so. It features a one Christian Bale, whom you might know from Batman Begins. It’s an interesting move that feels like a mix of Fight Club and some other movie involving a personal downward spiral. It’s pretty good.
What’s really amazing is Christian Bale. According to the trivia for the movie, Bale lost sixty pounds for the role. He plays a disturbingly thin protagonist, and the trivia claims that he ate merely an apple and can of tuna a day to lose weight.
Emily and I talked about this, and I postulated just how difficult it would be. We decided to try it.
I seem to be known for my gastronomic feats. I survived the University Chicken 911 Challenge—think really spicy chicken wings. I created a mailing list at work devoted entirely to edible meats. Friends never seem to forget that time in college where I attempted to live off of nothing but bananas and water for three days. (Yeah, it was bad, but isn’t college all about silly experiments?)
But I digress. Yesterday, Emily and I ate only an apple and a can of tuna each. Well, not precisely that—I substituted a Naked Juice Protein Zone™ drink instead of the can of tuna. I suppose I cheated a little, since the drink had twice as many calories as a can of tuna. Other than that, only water.
How did we fare? Fine, but we were hungry. In the afternoon I suffered a caffeine-withdrawal headache added to a lack-of-food headache, which lasted until the next morning. Other than that it was very undramatic.
Two things surprised me:
I’m shocked at the small amount of food that my body really needs. People survive on much less amounts of food every day. You’d think that I’d be smart enough to take the hint.
The weirdness I felt wasn’t my growling stomach (which, I might add, disappeared after a while). What I missed was actually enjoying food, and the gum helped with this, thankfully. I really wanted to sink my teeth into a torta with carnitas or to crunch a hard sourdough pretzel.
Today I could have filled up and let my stomach expand again, but I refused. I had a small, light lunch and then a single egg roll and wheat cracker at a company function. And I feel fine.
What happened to that afternoon craving for snacks? What about the urgent need to eat something in the morning? Why am I not as tired as I expected I would be, and where are monstrous headaches I usually get when I don’t eat for long periods? This is all very, very strange.
Anyway, this one-meal-a-day thing probably isn’t healthy, so I’m stopping it immediately. I should probably eat tiny meals more frequently, so I’ll make sure that the meals are balanced, but try to eat as little as possible. I’ll also need to find a way to enjoy (within reason) the things I really like to consume: beer, fried pork, and the occasional ice cream.
The experiment continues.
© Ian Langworth